Want To Influence? Listen

“Every hour of every day, at every level in every organization, influential people succeed and non-influential people don’t.” –Graham Roberts-PhelpsOne of the golden rules of the counseling profession is that everyone needs at least one person with whom they can openly and unashamedly discuss every detail, fear, and desire. Being accepted, appreciated, recognized, respected, desired, valued, approved of, or complimented – all of these impact the depth of our relationships and, thus, the degree to which we can influence and be influenced. I’ve coached executives and conducted workshops on all aspects of presentations for many years. One of the liveliest parts of the discussion emerges when I introduce the fact that influential presentations require at least as much time listening to the audience as speaking to them. For many, that’s counter-intuitive to the common notion of influence. Why Listen To Influence?Because once you toss out your big idea, others have to process it according to what they need and want.  The only way to arrive at a “meeting of the minds” is by asking
questions and listening in a way that: a. shows genuine interest, and b. helps
your understanding of how folks are experiencing “the big idea.”People don’t want to be influenced by you; they want to be understood, determine that certain needs and wants will be met, and then decide to opt-in with you. Former U.S. President Harry S. Truman summed it up the best. When asked his philosophy of leadership, he replied: “I find out what people want and then help them get it.” Want to build your base of influence? Find out what someone needs or wants and help them get it._______________________________Dad update: Thank you to all who commented, prayed, emailed, and even phoned regarding my father’s bout with recently-discovered cancer. I’m beyond thrilled to report that the tests showed that it had not spread at all, is in the first stage,and confined to a specific portion of this throat. He’ll begin 6 1/2 weeks of radiation therapy on Monday and, barring anything unforeseen, the doctors believe he will recover 100%. We are thankful for that prognosis as well as the outpouring of friendship and ongoing thoughts and prayers.
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Steve has designed and delivered leadership and communication programs for some of the world's largest organizations, and has more than 30 years in training, development, and high-level executive coaching. His Roesler Group has created and delivered leadership and talent development internationally for corporations such as Pfizer, Minerals Technologies, Johnson & Johnson, NordCarb Oy Ab, and Specialty Minerals--Europe. Steve is currently involved in the latest update of his Presenting With Impact program, a cross-cultural presentations workshop that has been delivered on five continents to more than 1,000 participants representing nearly 60 nationalities.

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Want To Influence? Listen

“Every hour of every day, at every level in every organization, influential people succeed and
non-influential people don’t.” Graham Roberts-Phelps

One of the golden rules of the counseling profession is that everyone needs at least one person with whom they can openly and unashamedly discuss every detail, fear, and desire. Being accepted, appreciated, recognized, respected, desired, valued, approved of, or complimented – all of these impact the depth of our relationships and, thus, the degree to which we can influence and be influenced.

I’ve coached executives and conducted workshops on all aspects of presentations for many years. One of the liveliest parts of the discussion emerges when I introduce the fact that influential presentations require at least as much time listening to the audience as speaking to them. For many, that’s counter-intuitive to the common notion of influence.

Influential Why Listen To Influence?

Because once you toss out your big idea, others have to process it according to what they need and want. 

The only way to arrive at a “meeting of the minds” is by asking

questions and listening in a way that:

a. shows genuine interest, and

b. helps

your understanding of how folks are experiencing “the big idea.”

People don’t want to be influenced by you; they want to be understood, determine that certain needs and wants will be met, and then decide to opt-in with you.

Former U.S. President Harry S. Truman summed it up the best. When asked his philosophy of leadership, he replied: “I find out what people want and then help them get it.”

Want to build your base of influence? Find out what someone needs or wants and help them get it.

_______________________________

Dad update: Thank you to all who commented, prayed, emailed, and even phoned regarding my father’s bout with recently-discovered cancer. I’m beyond thrilled to report that the tests showed that it had not spread at all, is in the first stage,and confined to a specific portion of this throat. He’ll begin 6 1/2 weeks of radiation therapy on Monday and, barring anything unforeseen, the doctors believe he will recover 100%. We are thankful for that prognosis as well as the outpouring of friendship and ongoing thoughts and prayers.


Link to original post

Steve has designed and delivered leadership and communication programs for some of the world's largest organizations, and has more than 30 years in training, development, and high-level executive coaching. His Roesler Group has created and delivered leadership and talent development internationally for corporations such as Pfizer, Minerals Technologies, Johnson & Johnson, NordCarb Oy Ab, and Specialty Minerals--Europe. Steve is currently involved in the latest update of his Presenting With Impact program, a cross-cultural presentations workshop that has been delivered on five continents to more than 1,000 participants representing nearly 60 nationalities.

Uncategorized

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