Sex in the City or Sex in the Workplace?

The research has been around for a long time.  It has to do with
our looks as members of the human race.  Most by now know that a large
majority of U.S. presidents were taller than average.  The same is true
for CEO’s.  On average, they’re taller too.

But the issue is more than height.  It’s also about looks.  Good
looks, and, to be politically correct, less attractive looks.

We live in a looks-based culture.  It’s expected in the movies, and, I
hope, obvious to most.  You know.  You can’t see 40-year-old Sarah
Jessica Parker without wanting to feed her a well-buttered croissant. 
But have you seen her husband recently?  He’s got an expanding waistline
that doesn’t seem to affect his roles.

But here’s the research finding, in legal terms from an article, Our
Beauty Bias Is Unfair
, by Dahlia Lithwick in Newsweek
The less attractive you are, the
more likely you are to receive a longer prison sentence, a lower damage
award and . . . a lower salary.

I assume that the American cultural priorities have changed
little over the past 25 years.  That being the case, here are the top
three arranged in order of most importance with #1 as the most
important:

  1. Beauty (handsomeness for
    males)
  2. Money (Notice.  Money is
    not the topmost value.)
  3. Intelligence.

In the earlier years of my
coaching business, there were a few occasions in which I was hired to
help a guy dress better: polish shoes, laundered all-cotton shirts,
stylish ties without food stains, neatly cut hair, etc.  That’s been a
long time since.  But people still look.  Sometimes it’s obvious to
them.  But even when it’s not obvious to the looker, the antenna
automatically pick up on attractiveness or the lack of it, including
dress.

But annoyed or not by this
information, I’d suggest that you not ignore reality.  I recommend that
you dress just slightly better than the average in your group.  The
payoff?  You’ll get a bit more attention from the boss which just may
translate to better opportunities.

Here’s how I handle the issue. 
Whenever I get a new client in a new firm, I always ask some details
about the dress code.  Consultants, like anyone else, can get
over-dressed or underdressed for the workplace.

And if you think dress is not
obvious, guess again.  On several occasions I’ve been hit on by a . . .
well, what do you call them today?  Hooker?  As a result of the last
experience, I had the good fortune to get really educated by a
professional, the concierge attendant at the Marriott outside Richmond,
VA.  I’d gone for dinner to a nearby mall, after a consulting gig.  The
restaurant opened to the outdoor mall area, and a hooker strolled up and
engaged me in conversation before I realized . . . .

I’d changed after consulting
with a CEO and was wearing old Lev’s and a comfortable, slightly worn
sport shirt.  I was so surprised, that I stopped by the concierge room
when I got back to the Marriott to talk to an obviously astute
African-American in her sixties for an explanation.  Which mall she
asked.  It was the upscale one.  “Oh honey, no guy your age without
money is going to be there.”  But she didn’t stop the education
process.  “It’s your leather belt.  You didn’t buy that for $25.  And
those shoes.  They’re Italian.”  But most of all, she said, “That
haircut.”  I interrupted her and asked what hair?  “Well, she went on. 
However little hair you have, it’s been styled, not cut.”  She was so
accurate that I was in a state of shock.  Then she ended the
conversation with a bit of fun.  “Honey.  If I was 25 years-old again,
I’d have hit on you too.”

Next question.  Why am I
calling your attention to this information?  Workmates and bosses notice
your appearance.  It may not immediately register, but if you’re
outside the norms, you’ll really get noticed and it won’t be to your
advantage.  That’s true for both males and females.  So watch your
package.

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