Once upon a time, men came to office, did the work they had to, and went home at 6 o clock in the evening. There, a hot meal and unconditional acceptance (if not necessarily ‘love’) could always be counted on.
You worked for money and got emotional support at home. But hey, that was then.
Today, there is no guarantee of that hot meal or unconditional anything, coz women are working, or following the daily soaps.
Besides, you don’t work just for money. You work for your life to be thrilling, meaningful, and full of tangible achievements. You must be recognised, praised, rewarded, respected, even loved for this act of showing up and doing your work.
When life at home is shitty, you take refuge in your office. Sometimes, that works. You live in a fantasy world where this is your family, and so you cross that lakshmanrekha – and share your secret world.
But let’s say life at office is equally shitty. And you don’t have a boss or colleagues for emotional support. You escape from home to be trapped in office. You escape from office, only to enter the torture chamber you call ‘home’.
There are millions of people out there in this horrible situation. And they simply don’t know how to get off this Misery Merry Go Round.
If you’re lucky, you have a bipolar mind where no matter what pins and needles are stuck in your heart, your mind continues to function and you are able to ‘deliver’ at work.
If you can’t, well then, at some point your job will be in danger. And then, things will only get worse.
Yes, it’s all very depressing but the worst of it is, it’s like second hand smoke. An ‘innocent bystander’ can also get depressed, when he or she becomes exposed to your toxic emotions, constantly.
Your problem thus becomes everyone’s problem. The world itself becomes sooty, coughy and grey.
Rashmi Bansal makes the case for building “emotional gyms” in today’s workplace for HR and business leaders to deal with Emotional Atyachar – moving beyond it