Advice? Find Out What “They” Want

Be careful when you give advice–somebody might take it.”Anonymous.Most of us enjoy giving advice. If you’re a manager, it may even make you feel a lot more managerial. And let’s be honest, advice is a lot more fun than criticism What Kind of Advice Is Desired? Counselors know that when someone arrives for a first visit, the story that unfolds is usually the “presenting” problem. People don’t feel comfortable putting it all out there quite yet; sometimes it’s just a matter of not being personally clear about what the real issue is.If you can’t tell what your employee or boss wants by how a subject is introduced, ask a few questions. Does the person want:To hear critical information and facts?To know your opinion on an issue?To get help with generating alternatives to a situation?To know how you went about doing something?To check out his or her reasoning on a decision?It’s easy to fall into the instant response trap; we all want to be helpful. Sometimes that kind of help isn’t helpful at all. Ask specifically what the other person wants. It will save you both a lot of time and lead to more satisfying results._________________________________Note: I’ve been traveling, speaking, and delivering leadership workshops since Talent: Strengths or Weaknesses?Yes. and  Are We Educating For The Right Jobs? I want to take some time this evening to read through the comments again and jump back into the conversation. Thanks to everyone for keeping it rolling. If you haven’t yet joined in, have a look; some good thinking going on there.
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Steve has designed and delivered leadership and communication programs for some of the world's largest organizations, and has more than 30 years in training, development, and high-level executive coaching. His Roesler Group has created and delivered leadership and talent development internationally for corporations such as Pfizer, Minerals Technologies, Johnson & Johnson, NordCarb Oy Ab, and Specialty Minerals--Europe. Steve is currently involved in the latest update of his Presenting With Impact program, a cross-cultural presentations workshop that has been delivered on five continents to more than 1,000 participants representing nearly 60 nationalities.

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Advice? Find Out What “They” Want

Be careful when you give advice–somebody might take it.” Anonymous.

Most of us enjoy giving advice. If you’re a manager, it may even make you feel a lot more managerial. And let’s be honest, advice is a lot more fun than criticism

What Kind of Advice Is Desired?

Advice1 Counselors know that when someone arrives for a first visit, the story that unfolds is usually the “presenting” problem. People don’t feel comfortable putting it all out there quite yet; sometimes it’s just a matter of not being personally clear about what the real issue is.

If you can’t tell what your employee or boss wants by how a subject is introduced, ask a few questions. Does the person want:

  • To hear critical information and facts?
  • To know your opinion on an issue?
  • To get help with generating alternatives to a situation?
  • To know how you went about doing something?
  • To check out his or her reasoning on a decision?

It’s easy to fall into the instant response trap; we all want to be helpful. Sometimes that kind of help isn’t helpful at all.

Ask specifically what the other person wants. It will save you both a lot of time and lead to more satisfying results.

_________________________________

Note: I’ve been traveling, speaking, and delivering leadership workshops since Talent: Strengths or Weaknesses?Yes. and  Are We Educating For The Right Jobs? I want to take some time this evening to read through the comments again and jump back into the conversation. Thanks to everyone for keeping it rolling. If you haven’t yet joined in, have a look; some good thinking going on there.


Link to original post

Avatar

Steve has designed and delivered leadership and communication programs for some of the world's largest organizations, and has more than 30 years in training, development, and high-level executive coaching. His Roesler Group has created and delivered leadership and talent development internationally for corporations such as Pfizer, Minerals Technologies, Johnson & Johnson, NordCarb Oy Ab, and Specialty Minerals--Europe. Steve is currently involved in the latest update of his Presenting With Impact program, a cross-cultural presentations workshop that has been delivered on five continents to more than 1,000 participants representing nearly 60 nationalities.

Uncategorized

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