Tough feedback is just that . . . tough! And while we may not ever get to a point where we look forward to sharing difficult information, there are ways to make these conversations less difficult.
One of the biggest reasons tough feedback is so tough is that we realize what we are about to share will shock, disappoint, or even anger the employee. However, usually it’s not necessarily the information that causes the shock, disappointment or anger, it’s the fact that the employee never saw it coming. The difficult news seems to come out of the blue and completely contradict the employee’s perception of the circumstances.
2. Give feedback throughout the year.
3. Focus on the task and the expectations around the task – not the person.
Here’s two examples:
– Specific, behavioral, and relevant to the job: “In today’s meeting, when you interrupted Dan, Jane and John to share your ideas, you made it difficult to gather full team input. Please let others complete their thoughts before you share yours.”
4. Make a plan with dates to discuss and update expectations – and document it.
Whether spoken or unspoken, expectations have a powerful impact on our thoughts, feelings, and actions. They play a key role in driving our attitudes. Research shows that employees who have clearly defined, well communicated expectations find more satisfaction and success in their work than people whose expectations remain vague and unspoken.
Believe it or not, the more you give feedback about uncomfortable issues, the less uncomfortable the sessions become. The sessions only become tough if you’ve been avoiding the issue.
Feedback sessions are tough when an employee is caught off guard. Taking a proactive approach to tough feedback eliminates the shock and surprise.